Road Rageous
Road Rageous
I like to think of myself as sweet, peaceful and kind. Thoughtful of others and that I wear my Live and Let Live hat 24/7.
Then there are times when people just get to me. Take yesterday for example. It's 12:30pm and I've got my girl Carla loaded in my hooptie and we're heading out of our work parking lot to pick up some vanilla lattes at Starbucks. As we near the exit of the parking lot, I see that some fool has left his white work truck parked within the parameters of the entrance/exit dip in the sidewalk. I don't mean that the fender is slightly entering the area, I mean that the entire length of the truck is sealing off the exit portion. I am forced to veer around it and exit through the entrance (risking some speed demon coming back from lunch and hitting me - it could happen). I become so incensed that I give the truck a blast of my horn. Wait, let me do another one. Then another one. Then I literally lay on it as I drive down the block so that if this jerk is in Gevork's Garage (the place of business next door to our office that has unlawful parkers infringing on us daily), then he can hear my wrath and know that this honk's for him.
The rest of the drive goes without incident and Carla and I have a lovely time dancing in the Starbucks while we wait for our lattes. I show off my pop locking moves and Carla and I do a full verse from some 80s rap song that now escapes me; but it sure did make the barrista giggle.
Into my car again and I put her in reverse. I'm a cautious driver mind you and I'm not so much accelerating as I'm easing off the brake when this puke colored Beetle comes barreling down behind me and gives me a terse "toot toot" of his horn! "Are you kidding me?!" I shriek, as this yahoo exaggeratingly steers around me like I could have killed him. My response to this of course is to honk my way out of the parking lot, once again, making sure the offender knows, that honk is for them.
The day is long but lovely (it is Administrative Professionals Day and I receive lots of flowers, a cupcake, a pizza party and a swell lipgloss and nail polish set) but still, 6 o'clock can't come fast enough.
Light rain drops hit the windshield on my way home and I'm calm and relaxed knowing that I don't have a single plan except to lounge and enjoy American Idol with perhaps a nice fire going.
I'm in the home stretch as I arrive at a small stop signed intersection just a few blocks from my house singing along to "The Wizard and I" from Wicked. It's one of those intersections where the distance between the four stopping points isn't quite equal, and the folks stopped to the left of me are a little further away than those to the right of me. I stop just after the far person on my left, and as I enter the intersection; the fool behind that first left man figures he'll go right on the heels of him without waiting for me to go. I don't want to get hit so I don't continue out much further but you can best believe that I gave him a full, and long lasting blast while yelling within the confines of my car "OH NO YOU DON'T! IT'S MY TURN!!"
I'm quiet the rest of the way home wondering if people have always been such terrible and inconsiderate drivers, or if perhaps I'm becoming an old lady who's now prone to using my horn to scold or "talk back" to my fellow drivers who make the mistake of misusing their horns on me.
In preparing to type out this blog today, I asked Carla to refresh my memory on who the first victim of my wrath was yesterday, and her response was "Wasn't it that old man who honked at you at Carl's Junior?...Oh wait, that was the day before."
Bless my heart.
I like to think of myself as sweet, peaceful and kind. Thoughtful of others and that I wear my Live and Let Live hat 24/7.
Then there are times when people just get to me. Take yesterday for example. It's 12:30pm and I've got my girl Carla loaded in my hooptie and we're heading out of our work parking lot to pick up some vanilla lattes at Starbucks. As we near the exit of the parking lot, I see that some fool has left his white work truck parked within the parameters of the entrance/exit dip in the sidewalk. I don't mean that the fender is slightly entering the area, I mean that the entire length of the truck is sealing off the exit portion. I am forced to veer around it and exit through the entrance (risking some speed demon coming back from lunch and hitting me - it could happen). I become so incensed that I give the truck a blast of my horn. Wait, let me do another one. Then another one. Then I literally lay on it as I drive down the block so that if this jerk is in Gevork's Garage (the place of business next door to our office that has unlawful parkers infringing on us daily), then he can hear my wrath and know that this honk's for him.
The rest of the drive goes without incident and Carla and I have a lovely time dancing in the Starbucks while we wait for our lattes. I show off my pop locking moves and Carla and I do a full verse from some 80s rap song that now escapes me; but it sure did make the barrista giggle.
Into my car again and I put her in reverse. I'm a cautious driver mind you and I'm not so much accelerating as I'm easing off the brake when this puke colored Beetle comes barreling down behind me and gives me a terse "toot toot" of his horn! "Are you kidding me?!" I shriek, as this yahoo exaggeratingly steers around me like I could have killed him. My response to this of course is to honk my way out of the parking lot, once again, making sure the offender knows, that honk is for them.
The day is long but lovely (it is Administrative Professionals Day and I receive lots of flowers, a cupcake, a pizza party and a swell lipgloss and nail polish set) but still, 6 o'clock can't come fast enough.
Light rain drops hit the windshield on my way home and I'm calm and relaxed knowing that I don't have a single plan except to lounge and enjoy American Idol with perhaps a nice fire going.
I'm in the home stretch as I arrive at a small stop signed intersection just a few blocks from my house singing along to "The Wizard and I" from Wicked. It's one of those intersections where the distance between the four stopping points isn't quite equal, and the folks stopped to the left of me are a little further away than those to the right of me. I stop just after the far person on my left, and as I enter the intersection; the fool behind that first left man figures he'll go right on the heels of him without waiting for me to go. I don't want to get hit so I don't continue out much further but you can best believe that I gave him a full, and long lasting blast while yelling within the confines of my car "OH NO YOU DON'T! IT'S MY TURN!!"
I'm quiet the rest of the way home wondering if people have always been such terrible and inconsiderate drivers, or if perhaps I'm becoming an old lady who's now prone to using my horn to scold or "talk back" to my fellow drivers who make the mistake of misusing their horns on me.
In preparing to type out this blog today, I asked Carla to refresh my memory on who the first victim of my wrath was yesterday, and her response was "Wasn't it that old man who honked at you at Carl's Junior?...Oh wait, that was the day before."
Bless my heart.
posted by MimiLolly at 11:54 AM
1 Comments:
Oh Dear, I fear, we're on the same page here!
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